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Rocky Road…No, not ice cream–Handling disappointments.

May 29, 2010

Chocolate melting in mouth, crunchy textures of nuts, chunky chocolate chips and smooth marshmellows–if only writing was as easy to enjoy.

Publication isn’t a simple feat and with the rise in competition and the change in trends, the industry is ever booming with writers and aspiring authors who look forward to reaching their goals.

There are bound to be many disappointments, but as long as you work hard, there will always be a sense of pride in what you’ve accomplished.

I choose to be optimistic. I think I’d rather grip onto that sense of accomplishment and say that I’ve attempted at something and will see to the end of that goal no matter what it is. Even starting a WIP is a great accomplishment, so open that word doc. Now!–its a start, a step closer than what you had before. Now you just have to forge to the end.

When you put your manuscript in someone else’s hand, it’s like holding your heart out and hoping the receiver will be gentle and give you good news. Sometimes that news isn’t what you want to hear, but you know what? It’d only make you a stronger person–a stronger writer.

Rejections are only a road block that every writer has to overcome and move forward. That’s where the tough skin comes in. Rejections are the ego-deflaters, but the only thing that matters is how well you, as a writer handles them.

My answer: Rocky Road ice cream, lots of chocolate and cake (preferably cupcakes). And wine. (Okay, maybe a little moping but not too much.) Then you start writing again. No excuse.

Disappointments and rejections are just a step in the learning process to publication.

I don’t think there would ever be an end to learning. There’s always room for improvements in a writer’s work and a writer, no matter published or unpublished should continue to make themselves better, no matter what roadblocks they face.

Sure, I’ve had my load of disappointments and rejections. I could remember my first rejection. It was like a knife gutted into my heart that twisted in different directions. Then I tried to be strong and thought to hang it up or frame it on a wall, believing that first rejection would only make me more determined to write. Sure, it did. I forged ahead and the more road blocks I came across, the more times I got knocked to the floor; I wanted to give up, especially when those rejections started to roll in like shocking waves that threatened to drown me. (I can’t swim.) My inflatable ego and dreams were lying pretty low.

But I’m still breathing. And writing. And nothing is going to stop that.

Every tidbit of feedback is a gold mine. It may not seem like much, but it could bring your MS closer to the end. I love giving my authors feedback and I love my CP’s who have only helped make me a stronger writer and editor. But being an editor and writer are two different things. I can never see all my flaws in my own work, which is why it’s important to have writers help writers.

Don’t be discouraged. Or disappointed. Journeys tough, but if you have determination, motivation, and will power and of course perseverance, it’ll happen. Have faith. Have hope.

Have your ice cream or chocolate and get writing!

What’s your excuse? How do you handle disappointments? Does it take one bucket of ice cream or two? LOL.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. May 30, 2010 1:30 am

    Well said. 🙂

    I remember my first rejection from Harlequin. I don’t think it was your standard form R, because I remember it starting out with “we cannot use this”. LOL I was CRUSHED. But I got over it and moved on. 🙂

    • May 30, 2010 7:20 am

      LOL. I guess some people aren’t very eloquent about rejections. But you’re awesome with the right attitude, which is why you’re so successful. Congrats!

  2. May 30, 2010 6:17 pm

    Great post, Clarissa. If I get unexpected negative feedback, or a rejection from an agent/editor I really wanted, it usually takes me a day to mope on it before I can move on. I work out when I’m stressed or upset. Sometimes I nap. And yeah, a little treat always brings cheer. I like frosted cookies, Almond Joy, Heath bars, and apple pie, but I usually get dark chocolate. 😉

    Anyway, once I’ve recovered, I’m usually either glad for the helpful feedback, or determined to make my story better. I’m an optimist and ever hopeful that one day all of these noes will bring me a yes.

    Happy writing!

    • May 30, 2010 6:43 pm

      Great attitude! I’m sure that yes will come sooner than you expect it. Keep up the hard work. And those frosted cookies sound so good.

      Thanks for stopping by!

  3. June 25, 2010 8:15 am

    I like your suggestion as to how to handle a rejection, Rocky Road ice cream. Yum Yum!

    Great post! Great advice.

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